Wednesday 11 January 2017

Key Ingredients of a Relationship

The core of any great and successful relationship is TRUST. Open conversations, honesty, and bitter truths are the key ingredients. If one replaces the key ingredients with half-truths, white lies and silence, the relationship will in time show signs of strains, cracks and instability. 

It is important to recognize and correct this as soon as you see the first signs of a crack or instability. The longer you take to address the concerns and repair the foundation, the deeper and more severe will be the damage and one day it will all breakdown under pressure.

I have seen fairy tale; picture perfect relationships crumble due to misunderstandings, white lies, and concealment of insignificant facts. "IF ONLY" are the 2 words that most couples use once the damage is already done.

So if you do see signs of cracks in your relationship, or if you have held back or hidden anything from your partner no matter how insignificant they may be, it is important that you set up time for a full disclosure and list down all the things that you have either forgotten to mention or chose not to reveal fearing the wrath of your partner.

I can tell you that from my experience, having a full disclosure makes you feel light, less pressurized and happy. My partner and I are completely honest with each other and we leave no stone unturned; there are no secrets or concealment of any facts. This is what helps us strengthen the bond we have. 

The benefit of doing this enables you to be stress free around your partner and you never need to worry about the ”What If she/he finds out", or "I need to be more careful" scenarios. You can live your life peacefully knowing that your partner knows everything about you and still accepts you for the person you are.

If you have done something that you know will upset your partner, lay it all out on the table and see where things go. If your partner decides to forgive you and forget then you need to ensure that you do not make the same mistakes again.

If you are one of the few who have willfully deceived your partner, it is time to swallow that bitter pill and take the rap. You never know how the other person will react. If they love you enough, they may forgive even your worst mistakes and it is then up to you to rebuild the trust you have destroyed piece by piece over time. It is not going to be easy, but you will have a clear conscience and you can be happy.

Life is filled with sharp unexpected turns and potholes and as long as your relationship has a good set of sturdy tires and shock absorbers it will brave the most unforgiving terrain.

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