Dr.D, the guard and the fly

The terrific trifecta superheroes have got my wife and I out of a jam on many occasions and I would like to admit that we’re not proud of resorting to such deceptive strategies; in our defence it’s one way of remaining sane as N keeps us on our toes all the time. I am not sure about B, but I for sure have self certified myself as a professional ballerina. Kids are way smarter than we think and currently N is making 700+ synaptic connections per second, so it won't be long before she calls our bluff. We need to be prepared and up our game, for now we are milking this until the cows come home.

Introductions

Dr. D, is N's pediatrician and we’ve made her believe that he sits in our lobby with an injection, waiting to be called upon when there is an issue with lack of food consumption, when screen time gets to be excessive or toys need to be picked up. Video calls are also made to him, when there is a fuss created to hydrate; we use a picture off the Internet. We almost got caught when N asked the doctor to clap for her, we were saved thanks to the sudden WiFi disruption caused by ‘The Guard’.

The Guard, is the security in the lobby and N believes he is in charge of the duration of time spent bathing/showering. He is also responsible for the sudden disruption of the WiFi.

The Fly, aka housefly, is the designated diaper inspector and makes its presence felt when diapers are not put on after a bath. Some habits are genetically encoded and she gets this from me. I’ve had my share of idiosyncrasies which drove people up the wall; my post “old man”, "Things I eat and how" are just the tip of the Iceberg, I guess what they say is true, what goes around comes around. Karma at its best.

I know that the D-day will come and we will no longer be able to get away with distractions and stories, but we will cross that bridge when we get to it.

B and I are still learning and we will probably make all the mistakes possible, for now we will use these superheroes to bail us out, in time we will have to stop outsourcing; replace the terrific trio and become the dynamic duo.

Wonder Years

This year my eldest sister who is 8 years older than I, will soon reach a significant milestone in her life. She gets highly infuriated when I mention her age and I, like any good brother would do, respect that and do not mention her age. This year I celebrated my 42nd birthday.

I am sure you've probably heard the phrase third time's the charm, which explains my parents quest for perfection and why they stopped trying, when I was born. If you ever ask my sisters, they will grudgingly admit, kneeling down with their arms outstretched praying for 'me'. This explains the immense love my sisters showered on me as a child.

To quote a few, my eldest sister just happened to role play a scene from a hindi movie and left me at the doorstep in the neighbouring building or how I was accidentally dropped a couple of times or the time, in the guise of giving me a haircut my eyebrow was 'accidently' snipped off. I am not saying these were attempts to get rid of me, I am just pointing out sheer string of coincidences that point to that train of thought.

Being the only boy was like being the only child as I was way younger than my sisters. I however was included in some of their games and I got to play several important leading roles; like the detective dog in Famous Five, the beggar child and a lamp post. I also played the part of the errand boy and a walking uber for their friends when they had parties.

Mind you, on a few occasions, I have repaid the stoic spiritual sacrifice of my sisters by ensuring fame to my eldest sister by dressing up as Mary Lou Retton and performed a flawless somersault in front of her friends or the time I selflessly allowed my other sister, the one who is not light-years older than I, to read my college classic literature books. She was so grateful that she gave me her limited stock of bendy straws and blank cassettes. I deny any mention of a barter system involved.

I also splurged my hard earned shady sticker business money on a delicious Chinese meal and monster chips, which was highly appreciated, consumed with delight and then spewed moments later. I was appalled and tried to extort a refund, as she did not care to hold it down until it was digested. The fact that she was seriously ill was irrelevant at that time.

Over the years my relationship with my sisters has improved considerably; I say this with conviction as I am still alive. My eldest sister who is still 26.3 years on Mars and has become wiser and more spiritual and my other sister has become a multi skilled, meticulous, talented mother. I for one will always be a reminder that God does have a sense of humour.

Then & Now

Then and Now

A lot has changed over time, some traditions still followed and new ones created. "When I was your age" has been used across the seven seas in different languages. Every time I heard these 5 words, I would roll my eyes and think "there we go again", little did I know that I would be mouthing these words decades later. These 5 words, I am sure have been passed down from generation to generation and will be time immemorial. 

Folklore has stated that the 1st known episode was approximately 4.2 million years ago, give or take a few hundred years. One scorching day a young Australopithecus was complaining how hot it was and how his feet hurt, he was immediately silenced by his grandfather who said "oook waup yau ra, dogoi trog neu lo, wangum talya au melidima grote Ra einsgp" roughly translates to when I was your age, I used to walk twice the distance in the land of a 100 suns and you complain...pfft.

Fast forward to 2021, my two going on twenty daughter was refusing to eat unless she got to hear "when you're happy and you know it, clap your hands". A song I have heard so many times, I involuntary start clapping whenever I hear the word 'happy'. For those of you who are reading this and thinking, If I had a child I'd never let that happen, I wish you good luck. The fact is a child is just being a child and he/she will imitate what they see, it is for us to understand and adapt. Screen time is not bad as long as it does not get to be excessive.

When I was young we didn’t have distractions and we had no choice but to use our imagination to have fun, we slept a lot better and ate what was cooked at home. Everything that we take for granted today was a luxury back then. We can’t really blame anyone for not being more patient, demanding or grateful, as we are drowning in an abyss of choices. Everything is available at a click of a button.

I wonder what "When I was your age" pearls of wisdom lil N will impart when she is older?. I bet that the disruption caused by Covid, will be right on top of the list.

It all boils down to a simple theory of demand and supply. It could be anything under the sun, the more you have the less you appreciate it and "Yes" that includes money too. Unfortunately, we realise what we have only once it is scarce. We need to appreciate what we have and 'live' in the present, as the past can't be undone and the future will always be a step away.

Last year I digitally detoxified and deleted my facebook and Instagram account, as I personally felt it was more of a distraction for me rather than a medium to connect with family and friends. However, technology when used wisely is a boon. Today we can easily connect, share our thoughts, pictures with anyone instantly. I have been working from home for the past 1 year, this would not have been possible 20 years ago.

This brings me back to appreciating what we have rather than focusing on how this pandemic has disrupted our schedule. I've always believed that things happen for a reason and although it may not be clear now it will all make sense later. Patience is a virtue and I try each day to live by it.

Twenty Twenty One

 Twenty Twenty One

Attempt #16 ...Gone are the days when I could just sit down and write. You would probably say, I need to get more organized and plan better, however writing cannot be planned, well atleast not for me. I write when my mind is relaxed and currently I've got 4 hamsters high on energy, working that wheel.

The 2020 pandemic reorganized the world over the course of a few months and we have started to live the "New Normal" now. It's been a year and we have successfully adapted. A lot of things that were deemed impossible, overnight became a possibility; such as 100% Work From Home in certain sectors, the "Need" to have maids, 90%+ online payments, the need to wear pants everyday or shave regularly, the list goes on. 

We are fettered by tradition and the 'tried and tested' ideologies. We rarely challenge and push boundaries. They say when push comes to shove, we discover potential.

Most people get too comfortable, both professionally and personally and are afraid to rock the boat...I ask why not? but if you are going to, then you better know/learn how to swim.

Personally it has been a rewarding experience getting to see my daughter grow. The simplicity at the way she looks at life makes me appreciate what I have so much more. Just the other day, the delivery agent came with a box of pampers and she squealed in delight and thanked me profusely, it's like I had given her the world on a diamond encrusted platinum platter.

As kids we appreciate the simplicity of life and as we grow, most of us lose that innocence and fall prey to the materialistic world. We then define success and "happiness" by the number of international stamps on our passport and the wealth we possess. Society reinforces this delusion through advertising.

2020 changed all of that to some extent, there was ban on travel and entertainment. Most places did not allow maids to enter gated communities. People had to adapt quickly and most were able to transition quickly. Some people learned new crafts and some caught up on all the sleep they missed in the previous years. I for one learned new ways of annoying my wife and the art of hiding in plain sight.

This pandemic has eviscerated the lives of many families. People curse the virus, the government, the situation they are in. However when you come to think about how it has survived so long and continues to run amok, it is due to our inability to follow rules. We continue to push boundaries and fail to be responsible. Will we ever be able to all follow rules ? The answer is a bitter pill to swallow.

I look at this period as an opportunity for us to make the best of what we have. We may not be able to change a lot, what we can do is change the way we see the world.